What inspired you to explore themes of mental health and depression in “Freeze”?
I experienced postpartum depression after both of my pregnancies over twenty years ago. When I faced cancer ten years ago, it was also very challenging, but I found myself ready to talk about it sooner. My earlier single “Fire” was inspired by my cancer struggle. However, witnessing others struggle with depression made me realize it was time to share my own story. I wanted to offer a personal perspective and capture the true essence of depression as I remember it, even after all these years. Depression taught me the importance of caring for my body and mind and not overextending myself. Even now, when I sense I’m taking on too much, my body signals me to slow down, and I make sure to listen.
The music video is excellent, how many takes did you have to do?
Thank you, the making of the video is actually a great story. The efficient and skillful shooting of the video is thanks to the director, Juha Särestöniemi. Watching him work was like watching a symphony conductor leading a full orchestra. He even got the weather to cooperate! The video was shot in two parts, the part inside the bus was done in April and the embrace at the end outside the bus was done in May. The part in April was done with a larger group of people, but Juha directed everything and everyone so skillfully that the whole thing was done in an hour, and this included two versions, one in Finnish and the other in English.
The weather indeed cooperated magically on both days. For the main part of the video that took place inside the bus, we had hoped to get some kind of bad weather to illustrate the despair of depression. In April, it had been a nice weather all week, but on the day of the video shooting, we got a snowstorm. It worked out perfectly. And then in May, the plan was to shoot the end part outside the bus on a sunny day since the lyrics at the end talk about a sunny day and how it will help me survive. We actually had to chase the sun that day because it kept drizzling. Juha would look in the weather app to see where we would have to drive the bus to find a potentially sunny moment. We found our moment, Juha did three takes of the embrace, and we were done. It took five minutes to do the video shooting for that part. Once we were done, it started raining again.
What message do you hope listeners take from “Freeze,” especially those who might be struggling?
Any of us can fall ill, but we must remember we’re not alone in this world. When you’re depressed, it’s easy to think that nobody will understand how you’re feeling. But I’m here to tell you that there are people who do understand what you’re going through. Even when you think your soul is broken, and you feel like you’re sinking deep, there is still always hope. The sunny day will eventually come and help you survive.
How does “Freeze” fit within your current single series, and what makes it unique?
My other singles have also been based on personal experiences and reflections, but this topic is now extremely personal and vulnerable. Mental health is also very timely in many people’s lives. Even though I have been lucky to be free of clinical depression for twenty years by now, I still remember the lessons from those times on a regular basis. Whenever my body gives me signals that I’m doing too much, I know I must listen. So, it’s still very personal and something to be mindful about.
Any more releases planned in the future?
I plan to continue making singles until I have a full album. Once I have the full album, I’d love to create a live show with elements of a musical and make it into a full story-telling performance on stage. And I plan to have a vinyl album made once I have enough songs. It is important for me to make these singles at my own pace to keep my stress levels in check. And since I’m making these myself in my own studio, I can adjust the pace to my needs, which again supports my mental health. For the next single I do have some initial inklings about a topic, but it’s not quite ready to be worked on. I always need to hold space between the singles to kind of reset everything. I can’t force it. The day will come, most likely in the next few weeks, when I get an impulse to grab the guitar and start composing.
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Photo Credit: Minna Ora.